Getting My MBA

My family may be heading into a very difficult time, but we don’t know yet. We’ll know shortly, and it’s a little nerve-wracking.

I found myself trying to pray about it. I didn’t know what to ask for. I just sat there, with the communication lines open, just not knowing what to say. Finally, the only thing I could ask for was this: just be with us, Lord. Whatever happens, we can make it through, if you’re there.

I’m either growing up or falling away — time will tell.

That’s what one of my dorm-mates used to say all the time (Jim, if you’re out there somewhere, drop me a line!). It was said in an “uncool white guy trying to hang with the way cooler homies” way, intentionally unhip, which was, of course, ironic and hip in its knowledge and flaunting of its own unhipness — predating Weird Al’s “White and Nerdy” by 20+ years. It had those layers of “with it” that somehow seem to thrive only in academic environs. But I digress….

The point of the saying (on one of those many levels anyway) was to remind the listener to figure out why something was done or was necessary. Yet another pointless Humanities chapter to read? “What’s it mean, bro?” Well, it means keeping a good GPA. And, the subject covered means something, somehow, about who we are and why we’re here — despite the frantic efforts of the Humanities department to obscure any potential value of examining the past. And it means that life is filled with things we have to do even if they seem pointless (septic tank pumping, anyone?).

I’m back in school, now, working frantically to keep up and to keep work running and to keep my family running. To be more accurate, most of the family and household duties fall on my wife. That’s why I’m asking myself “what’s it mean, bro?” Is there a point to this MBA quest? My oldest only has another two years of high school left. Am I using that time well? All my kids will be gone in 9 years. Should I be doing something else with them? So what if I never make CIO — I probably won’t anyway, even with my crummy piece of paper from my mediocre school.

Like much of life, I guess, I’ll keep on my current path until the pain becomes too great to ignore. Or until I have a brilliant flash of insight. But I’d bet on the pain happening first….

Well, I am anyway. The added effort and time for two classes (8 hrs/wk) and homework (2-20 hrs/wk) is adding up. And I’m just getting started!

My hope is that I will figure out how to hit my stride, that I’ll catch my second wind, and will be able to hitch onto those Chariots of Fire and keep the pace. Hmm, enough running cliches there? How about clearing the many hurdles and breaking the tape?

I think I had a point there. I’m too tired to remember … oh yeah, that was it. Tired. “What did you expect?”, I hear you say (ain’t the internet amazing?). “You’re the one who insisted on adding to your already busy life.” Well yes, yes I am the cause of my own distress. Thanks, I feel much better now.

The good news, though, is that one obligation is off my plate. My youngest son has finished his football season and I no longer need to wake him up at 5am, drive to cold, foggy football fields 45 minutes away, and get him ready to play — all before 7am. Also, my obligation to take pictures of the game and post them on the website is done. Granted, that was a responsibility I took on myself (noticing a pattern here?), but it was a lot of fun.

Well, if I survived it at 19 I can do it at 39, right? 19 and 39 are practically the same age, when you consider the billions of years that scientists say it took for life to evolve on earth. Heck, I’m a kid!

Now tell that to my eyelids…